THERAPY FOR COUPLES
CULTURE
Culture influences the way we see and experience the world but also how we exist in relationship with our partner. Culture shapes who we are and what we expect in relationships, but often these expectations are not talked about and might even clash or make your partnership feel unbalanced, or even tense. Together, we will explore your relationship from a cultural lens, including how you were raised, the values you grew up with, the role of family and friends in your relationship, as well as many other things that may contribute to your dynamic. We will brainstorm ways to shift and help both of you get your needs met, so that each partner feels validated and understood.
COMMUNICATION
You have the same discussions/arguments over and over. They escalate quickly and are hardly ever productive. Yelling doesn't help, but neither does avoiding important topics altogether. Yet, those are the two places you often find yourself in.
Communication is one of the most common issues couples struggle with. What you say and how you say it can have a huge impact on your connection as a couple. Additionally, what you don't say, no matter how well-intentioned, can also contribute to tension in the relationship. Together, we will unpack all the things that are said and unsaid. We will explore your communication styles and what are often unconscious beliefs and expectations. We will learn and practice ways to de-escalate and finally break out of this cycle. The hope is that you deepen your understanding of each other and walk away from therapy with useful tools to communicate in a productive way.
NEW PARENTS
You had a fairly healthy dynamic when it was just the two of you. But now there's a new baby/child in the house and your world has changed pretty drastically. Not only are you adjusting to this new routine and new person with all their own needs, you and your partner are also dealing with the stress in your own ways that often feel like they work against each other. Irritability and tension are high. And it's hard to see a way out. Having a new baby in the house can be very jarring, regardless of how much you prepared. It can be easy to feel as if you don't have any control over your time, especially when everything seems to revolve around this little being.
AND your needs are important.
We will work together to understand what's working and what's not. What parts of parenthood are particularly hard and what parts you love. We will explore how your needs may have shifted since having a baby and what you can each do to support each other in navigating this uncharted territory, while also re-connecting to yourselves as individuals and as a couple.
OTHER GOALS FOR THERAPY CAN INCLUDE:
-
Strengthening your bond as a couple
-
Discovering what makes you feel most connected to your partner
-
Understanding your own needs and how to communicate them in a way your partner can hear
-
Understanding how your vulnerabilities are connected to early life experiences and other relationships
-
Developing strategies for managing stress and conflict
-
Developing your capacity for self-reflection and build your resources for self-care
-
Discovering a new level of intimacy and connection
-
Learning how to track yourself and your partner
-
Exploring your underlying assumptions about relationships
-
Developing regular practices that nurture and sustain your relationship
-
Adopting new language for your feelings and experiences
-
Exploring ways you can best support each other
-
Finding support with communication, infidelity, family conflict, parenting and step-parenting, grief, loss, cultural differences, how substance use impacts the relationship, financial stress, sexual challenges, separation, divorce or anything else you may be struggling with
MY APPROACH
I provide online therapy for couples. My style is warm and curious, compassionate and direct. In my work with couples, I facilitate communication & help each partner understand the other as well as feel understood. I strive to help partners understand the dynamics of their relationship while also learning about themselves as individuals. Together, we explore your strengths and challenges as a couple. We will practice new ways of communicating while also developing your capacity to be sensitive to each other's hurts and triggers. My hope is to provide both emotional support & practical tools to help you reconnect and rediscover each other in a new & healthy way.
SCHEDULE A CONSULTATION
All 20-minute phone consultations are conducted by our owner, Monica Ramil. This is an opportunity for you to share what you'd like to work on in therapy and to ask any questions about the process or the practice. From there, you will be able to schedule a first session with an available clinician.